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I went to a fight (aka: Boxing match, kiddies!) the other night and a hockey game broke out! No respect, I tell ya! No respect!
Keep 'em comin', fellers!
I tell you, with my doctor, I don’t get no respect. I told him, “I’ve swallowed a bottle of sleeping pills.” He told me to have a few drinks and get some rest.
If it weren't for pick-pocketers, I'd have no sex life at all.
When my old man wanted sex, my mother would show him a picture of me.
I knew a girl so ugly that she was known as a two-bagger. That's when you put a bag over your head in case the bag over her head breaks.
When I was a kid I got no respect. The time I was kidnapped, and the kidnappers sent my parents a note they said, "We want five thousand dollars or you'll see your kid again."