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It’s “rivalry” week so, Iowa joke thread...

All 'N' 011808

Former Walk-on
5 Year Member
Invited to a wedding reception by a relative, an Iowa grad and his son travel to the big city for the first time.
After eating a lot of salty food, the father is thirsty and continually sends his son for water.
After the last trip the kid comes back empty-handed. The father asks, “So where’s my water, boy?”
“Couldn’t get any this trip, Pa. Some guy’s sitting on the well.”
 

All 'N' 011808

Former Walk-on
5 Year Member
A family of Iowa football supporters whom have no affiliation with the U of I what-so-ever head out to do some shopping. The son picks up an ISU jersey and tells his mother he’s decided to become a Cyclone fan and wants this for Christmas. The mother, upset, whacks him on the head and says “Go see your father!” Off he goes with the ISU jersey in hand to find his dad. Dad, I’ve decided I’m going to be an Iowa State fan and want this jersey for Christmas. The father is outraged, whacks his son on the head and says, “No son of mine will ever be seen in THAT!” Then the father goes into a rant into the store marching up and down the aisles yelling “Go Hawks” to random people that come by. On their way home the father says I hope you learned something today. The son says yes, I have. “What is it?” his family replied. I’ve only been a Cyclone fan for an hour and I already hate you Hawkeye idiots.
 

All 'N' 011808

Former Walk-on
5 Year Member
A guy in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, “Want to hear a good Iowa football joke?” The guy next to him replies, “Well before you tell that joke, you should know something. I’m 6′ tall, 200 lbs., and I am an Iowa football player. The guy sitting next to me is 6′ 2″ tall, weighs 225, and he’s an Iowa football player. And the fella next to him is 6′ 5″ tall, weighs 250, and he’s an Iowa football player. Now, you still wanna tell that joke?” The first guy says, “No, not if I’m gonna have to explain it three times.”
 

RedStones

Just do the right thing damnit!
5 Year Member
1. How can you tell the toothbrush is an Iowan invention?
25799518_9435b9104b_o-700x525.jpg

Flickr.com/ Joe Sepielli
If it were invented anywhere else, we'd call it a teethbrush.

More: http://www.onlyinyourstate.com/iowa/jokes-ia/

The most popular pick-up like in Iowa is "Nice Tooth"
 

All 'N' 011808

Former Walk-on
5 Year Member
Do you know why Iowa does not like playing on synthetic turf? Because their cheerleaders cannot graze!
Recently, they put cardboard on the actual field and left the grass on the boundaries up to the bleachers. The grass as you said is for the cheerleaders, and the cardboard is because the coaches heard that their team looks better on paper.
 

DuckTownHusker

Blackshirt Sith Lord
10 Year Member
I'll do you guys one better and get a Buff jab in there, too.

You know why Nebraska slopes to the west? Because Colorado sucks and Iowa blows.
 

MyBraska

Varsity
5 Year Member
How do you get an Iowa cheerleader into an elevator? Grease her hips and throw in a Twinkie.
 
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